No Way Jose!!!

I can only be so nice, and I already have a big problem saying no. Evidence has presented itself that I am once again saying yes too much and now people think they can count on that yes from me.

I am an executive assistant at a bank and part of my duties is that I am at my desk so that I can pick up my boss’s phone. Our office has a receptionist desk that has one full-time receptionist and two back-ups that are staffed there everyday. That is a lot of people I think to cover a front desk. So why is it that they are always calling for me to cover for them? It could be a couple of options, either they are incompetent, or I have said yes too often, or both.

I am always the one willing to lend a helping hand. I say yes to everything and regret half of what I have said yes to. I find that some people really appreciate and need my help and only ask sparingly, while others feel free to use it whenever for whatever because they are too lazy to deal with their stuff.

The most egregious event at this current job is when the receptionist said that she had to help someone with technical issue (it sounded fishy, because she is clearly not in IT), but it was an emergency and she needed my help urgently, she said that the other two back-ups were no where to be seen. Well ten minutes into being up there, the two back-ups come from having a smoke break and say to me, “What are you doing up here? We told her we would not be able to cover her for something personal”. I was duped again for doing something nice.

Now mind you, when I cover the front I have to leave everything that I am doing behind and can’t do my job while I am away. And I always cover for them unless I absolutely can’t. I say yes when all the other 5 assistants in the building have said no.

So today, the receptionist asked me if I could cover her from 4:30pm to 5. It was a half-lie but I said that I was leaving early and no I could not cover for her. I am going to try and sneak out early, but I may not be able to. Her reason was that her friend was going to take her to pick up her car that broke down on the freeway. Am I an asshole? I am kind of feeling like one, but if her friend was any kind of friend, the person taking her would wait until 5pm to take her to her car. Or her husband could come pick her up and take her to her car. Or she could ask the other back-up person to (gasp) stay late, as that is her only job is to do back-up for the receptionist desk.

It seems like in my life when I say yes to some people it’s like it gives them license to not stand up and take responsibility for their own situation, because it’s much easier to ask me to bail them out. While I am all for helping people out, I also believe you should not lean on them to the point that they are your crutch. As someone who has dragged around dozens of “crippled” friends and family, it seems like I am doing them a better service by telling them no, and making them stand up and take care of themselves.