I see London, I see France, I am so thankful to see my 3 year old in underpants. While I was busy applying more rubber to the road all over the Bay Area, Mr. Von Snarky took the bull by the horn and sent Drew to Preschool in underpants. And guess what? They came back dry!
And then over the weekend while we were home, he didn't have an accident the whole time. (wheep, sniff) You see I am just so damn thankful I will not have to wipe poo for a while until I see a plump, sweet-smelling baby and decide I have to have another one. It's so great not be trying to get the largest size diaper they make to fit on your 3 year old that is as tall as a 5 year old. We had to get him out of diapers, because they weren't making them big enough anymore.
Thank you! Thank you heaven for no more smelly pants!
Monday, March 31, 2008
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Thanks and Thanks a Lot
Thanks Mr. Von Snarky for reporting my whereabouts. I have not runaway with a tall swede. Thank you for hanging in there with me, I started a new job this week with Mega Bank, which is turning out to be a great thing for me. They even gave me an office, which I feel totally uncomfortable in, see I am a cubicle monger. I am hiding behind my desk as we speak thinking that the office police are going to come in and take their office back. See they must have made a mistake in thinking I was adult enough for an office. Does this mean I have to act like an adult? Because farts still make my laugh.
So here comes the snarky "thanks a lot". With my new job I have been going to different banking locations and closing them down. Part of that requires me to pack up their credit files. Because this is such a cumbersome task I have been going from location to location logging, packing, security seals, logging some more, taping and cursing. This one location begged me for their help, said they had tons of files, and they were just so busy, and to please save them from file boxing hell. I arrive and find that they only have 8 drawers to box ( Where did the other 10 million that they were complaining about go?)
While I am feverishly packing away files on the second floor of the bank with no idea what is going on downstairs, I didn't realize that the bank closed at 4:30pm. I go to take the elevator down at 4:45pm and realize that I can't get down the elevator into the branch to exit the bank. I called downstairs and got no answer. I frantically looked for an emergency staircase which to my amazing luck exited outside the building. I look in the window of the bank and there is no one in there. Well gee thanks a lot for locking me in the building. I probably set off the alarm when I went out the emergency exit. And when I got back to my car, I had a parking ticket.
Things are going better this week, however I am all over the place.
So here comes the snarky "thanks a lot". With my new job I have been going to different banking locations and closing them down. Part of that requires me to pack up their credit files. Because this is such a cumbersome task I have been going from location to location logging, packing, security seals, logging some more, taping and cursing. This one location begged me for their help, said they had tons of files, and they were just so busy, and to please save them from file boxing hell. I arrive and find that they only have 8 drawers to box ( Where did the other 10 million that they were complaining about go?)
While I am feverishly packing away files on the second floor of the bank with no idea what is going on downstairs, I didn't realize that the bank closed at 4:30pm. I go to take the elevator down at 4:45pm and realize that I can't get down the elevator into the branch to exit the bank. I called downstairs and got no answer. I frantically looked for an emergency staircase which to my amazing luck exited outside the building. I look in the window of the bank and there is no one in there. Well gee thanks a lot for locking me in the building. I probably set off the alarm when I went out the emergency exit. And when I got back to my car, I had a parking ticket.
Things are going better this week, however I am all over the place.
Jet Setting
It has come to my attention that my favorite blogger has been absent for a bit.
The lack of phone calls, emails and other such contact from her might otherwise lead me to believe that she has run away for holiday with a well built swede, if I didn't find her plastered to the floor in exhaustion every night.
She is in fact alive, wishing she were here.
The lack of phone calls, emails and other such contact from her might otherwise lead me to believe that she has run away for holiday with a well built swede, if I didn't find her plastered to the floor in exhaustion every night.
She is in fact alive, wishing she were here.
Friday, March 14, 2008
RIP IPOD
We gathered here today to honor my beloved IPOD, who died a tragic death at the bottom of my briefcase when I bottle of water popped itself open and drowned it's poor electronic soul. Mr. Von Snarky fought hard to save your life, by opening you up and using canned air on your little parts to revive you, but to no avail. You finally went off life support last night.
To say that you will be missed is an understatement, you are practically a limb to me. You have performed well for being dropped almost daily, thrown, stepped on and carried everywhere. You have been squeezed into the bottom of purses and been banged around in coat pockets. I bought you every accessory known to man to make up for the abuse. But in the end it was my negligence that caused your death.
Now who will do dishes with me? Who will go on long car drives with me? Sit with me while I do accounting? Fly with me on planes? Your sweet sound and unending play list will be sorely missed. You served us well. Rest in peace in electronic heaven. However, your body will be going to the electronics recycling place, but RIP just the same.
To say that you will be missed is an understatement, you are practically a limb to me. You have performed well for being dropped almost daily, thrown, stepped on and carried everywhere. You have been squeezed into the bottom of purses and been banged around in coat pockets. I bought you every accessory known to man to make up for the abuse. But in the end it was my negligence that caused your death.
Now who will do dishes with me? Who will go on long car drives with me? Sit with me while I do accounting? Fly with me on planes? Your sweet sound and unending play list will be sorely missed. You served us well. Rest in peace in electronic heaven. However, your body will be going to the electronics recycling place, but RIP just the same.
Monday, March 10, 2008
In the last 24 hours
I have...
- Cleaned a whole role of toilet paper out of the toilet
- Washed a whole mess of Vicks Vapo Rub off my child that he thought was sunscreen
- Had three glasses of champagne
- Been locked in a closed bank
- Gotten a parking ticket
At this point, I would like to repeat the three glasses of champagne.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Gasping for Air
Life is moving way too fast at the moment (panting) and I can't seem to catch up at the moment (falls on the floor in a pile of sweat). Been traveling for work, lot's of changes, meeting new people (gulping water). Will post when I can form thoughts (does face plant into floor and waves).
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
